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In the News
Remembered: March 1st, 2009
Monday, March 1, 2010
This is the only day I will post after Dad's passing. Not because there is nothing to say, quite the opposite, but because when I envisioned this project Dad was the focus. I have enjoyed posting these memories in ways I never thought possible. Not only was I able to process what happened, but I was also able to have conversations that might not have occurred otherwise. That makes all this worth it.
As the snow covered the ground and others celebrated, I mourned. I made final plans, and I tried not to throw up on anyone. The reality of my loss had made my body rebel against the world in strange and uncomfortable ways. I was surrounded by people, but still felt endlessly alone. The comfort people tried to provide sometimes stung since I knew they were thankful it wasn't them. They didn't have to pick a casket in a cold, empty room. They didn't have to tell those too far away to come the sad news. They didn't have to write a eulogy. They didn't have to bury their Dad.
But, I also discovered something that only appears in situations like this: the true love of your family. While other disappointed with their human errs, others shined like stars. And I am thankful for them all. You are made up of everything you encounter, good and bad. All that matters is if at the end of it, you can look yourself in the mirror.
I am proud of what I did for my Dad. His final gift to me, was showing me that no matter what happens in my life, I made a difference to at least one person on this earth. I was my Dad's person, I guided him through his last days with laughter and love. I said all those things you forget to tell your parents, or can't because they are so crazy.
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